Sutton's Book Is Out - Will It Stop Bullies?

Just a few days ago I mentioned Robert Sutton's upcoming book, The No Asshole Rule [his title]. It's out early, and as expected, makes interesting reading.

One thing that stands out is what he calls "the chapter I didn't want to write" near the end of the book: how sometimes everyone needs to act like an asshole to get things done and why this is can be effective. To put it bluntly, it's because sometimes that's the only way you get listened to or get respect.

He cites research by Larissa Tiedens who showed groups tapes of Bill Clinton discussing the Lewinsky incident. In one clip he is sad about it all and in the other angry about everything that happened. Reacting afterward, those who saw the "angry" tape were far more likely to agree that Clinton should stay on as leader of the country. Sutton's take: that all too often we expect leaders to be aggressive and we penalize those who don't fit our stereotype even if we personally don't want to be the butt of it. Teidens actually did a number of such studies, all with similar outcomes, showing that we perceive angry people as stronger and more leader-like than balanced compromisers.

Leadership developers have a challenge: they shouldn't take away the strengths people have... and if anger drives action, that's a strength. But we need to supply these leaders with the judgment and coping skills to handle it so it's not toxic to them or others, which it very much can be.